Wellbeing & Self-help

New safety measures in place – please read before booking your appointment

In line with updated legislation (20th December 2020) I CAN offer essential treatments as a complementary healthcare giver, for the relief of pain or mental health difficulties that cannot be self-managed.

This means I CAN offer: reflexology, Indian head massage and therapeutic Swedish massage for relief of, for example: anxiety, stress, headaches/migraines, muscular tension causing pain.

I CANNOT offer relaxing massages at this time nor holistic facials.

I CANNOT treat the clinically extremely vulnerable without clinician referral in writing.

Updated Health & Safety Protocol

BEFORE BOOKING ensure you:

*do not show symptoms
* have not been in contact with someone showing symptoms
*have not been abroad in the last 14 days

PLEASE RESCEDULE YOUR APPOINTMENT IF THERE ARE SUDDEN CHANGES IN THE ABOVE CRITERIA

WHEN ARRIVING please:

* wear a face mask and gloves/use disposable tissues when using door handles/buzzers
*wash hands upon arrival
*BRING YOUR OWN BLANKET/COVERING (disposable towels are provided but are thin. Additional covering is usually used)

AFTER YOUR TREATMENT please keep warm and allow time to rest.

ENSURE ANY SYMPTOMS EXPERIENCED WITHIN 14 DAYS FOLLOWING TREATMENTS ARE REPORTED.

BETWEEN APPOINTMENTS windows in the treatment room are opened allowing fresh air to circulate; door handles and work surfaces are disinfected.

‘Only if an evil Wind encounters an Empty body can it take up residence in the body’. (Ling-shu ch66)

Meaning: nourish your internal health for resilience to disease.

In a nutshell: cool feet to drain excess energy from your head, unless they’re cold, in which case – warm them up!

Heat is energy. If your feet are cold, energy is not being fully circulated around the body – it’s stuck somewhere. Heat tends to travel upwards – perhaps there’s too much energy stuck in your head – racing thoughts, sinus congestion, head-aches? Or digestion – heartburn, indigestion, IBS….all leading to irritability, sluggishness and general body stiffness?

When asked, I find many people don’t even know if their feet are are cold; they are just not aware of them! But bear in mind that your body is designed with a circulatory system that takes blood (energy/oxygen/nutrients etc) all the way down to the feet but especially all the way back up again – it has to conduct a 180° turn at the feet and travel upwards, against gravity, through all your vital organs on its way back to the heart. Make sure this process is not hindered in any way by supporting circulation:

Keep feet and ankles warm, especially in cold climates/when run-down

Wear two pairs of socks if necessary – one cotton pair and thicker, woolly ones on top (cotton breathes, as does wool which also regulates temperature better than synthetic fibres)

Wear boots or shoes with a substantial sole, especially if working on cold tile or concrete floors. These floors are particularly cold (whereas wood and carpet flooring retain heat) and this travels up through the feet to the lower back, chilling the whole body and weakening immunity. Feet need protecting against this so open-toed or pump-type slip-ons are no good in these conditions.

A hot foot soak is a simple home remedy that can turn your health around. I use a plastic storage box from Homebase (it maintains the water temperature better than heated foot spas) and fill it with warm water to cover at least half way up the calves. Epsom salts and essential oils can be added for extra therapeutic benefit. I love the Weleda herbal bath milk range which really smell divine. Increase the temperature until your feet are warm, even hot (to throw off a cold) and rest for about 20 minutes. Wear warm socks and boots/slippers afterwards.

Weleda’s Arnica Muscle Soak is a great discovery. Active relief from aching sprains and strains with warming rosemary and lavender oils to aid healing circulation. A treat for the senses!

Cooling feet down

If feet are too hot, cooling them can have a marked effect on stress and tension in the head and upper body. Perhaps you may be standing on them all day with no respite, working in a busy, excessively heated office environment? This can lead to feelings of being hot and bothered with a racing mind and head-aches. This time cooling the feet can literally drain all the excess heat and tension away, leaving you clearer headed and noticeably calmer.

This also works really well for insomnia and explains why the old wives’ tale of wearing cold socks to bed helps cure sleeplessness. The idea is to place cotton socks in cold water and ring out until just damp (this creates a cooling effect), put on then cover with real woollen socks: the properties of wool allow it to absorb excess moisture and breathe, also preventing a chill later in the night. I find just leaving feet out of the covers until they’re cool serves this purpose but if really bad, going for a cold foot/lower leg shower has a more dramatic effect.

Become more aware of your feet. These simple steps can nip an imbalance in the bud, before a migraine or cold takes hold.

For 30 minute reflexology-based foot massages, offers & more click on the BOOK NOW tab above

In a nutshell: pain causes tension. Do people pay good money to have their tension increased or reduced?

Yet again I have had a new client tell me of their previous experience with massage. Once the therapist located knots, they were ‘professionally informed’ that these needed to be worked out. The client found this very painful! The therapist reassured the client that this was part of the process and it would be worth it in the long run. My client told me she hurt for three days afterwards. Funnily enough, she didn’t go back.

This is not an isolated incident: I have heard similar reports of actual bruising caused by treatments, clients left feeling as if they’d ‘been run over by a bus’, clients clearly expressing their discomfort – even being in tears – yet the therapist continuing in the mistaken belief that it is doing some good. (These reports are not just regarding deep tissue or sports massage.)

Nowhere in my training did it state a client would experience severe discomfort and it certainly never stated I should over-ride the feedback given to me: quite the opposite! I understand the natural urge as a therapist, to work through the knots and tension presented as part of treatment – I get that too. There is a sense of satisfaction in ironing out knots and relieving some of the troubles that have brought a client to seek your help. But it has to be a two-way process; no-one knows their body like the client themselves.

It is now part of my initial introduction to request that clients feed back to me, when needed, during treatment. I can feel knots and tension within the body but I cannot feel a client’s pain threshold and response to pressure applied. So there is, for want of a better term, a ‘good pain’ that feels as if aching tension is being addressed – this usually feels good, you want it to continue, it is the process of increased blood supply (carrying nutrients for cell repair; taking away ‘cell debris’) being directed to an area that has been starved of this – and ‘actual pain’ which is a sign that something is wrong and needs to stop.

If tension is the cause of knots, aches and pains then relaxation is the cure: doing the opposite to what created tension in the first place. Massage is a means to this end and should offer a variety of techniques, not just to work out the physical results of tension, but to aid deep relaxation – thus utilising the body’s own healing mechanism – designed to restore, repair and rebuild: the parasympathetic nervous system.

In a nutshell: it is passive rather than active stretching: do not force a stretch – get into position and allow gravity to release tension for you. Take longer over each stretch, allow muscles to melt as you breathe out. The degree of your success is determined by the degree to which you can let go, NOT strive. This mentality is the polar opposite to the mentality that caused tension in the first place.

Disclaimer: I am not a qualified yoga or fitness instructor. I am just someone who has struggled with back pain and learned ways to overcome it. I am not advising, merely explaining how I have achieved results by stretching in this way.

I was very fortunate to spend about 10 weeks with a really good hatha yoga instructor when I was 2o years old. I’d heard it was good but didn’t really know why; I just thought it would be a positive practice that would help me with my pregnancy. I had no idea it would expand my thinking and outlook so much.

I dragged my partner along as somehow felt it would prepare us for childbirth together. He was equally stubborn and insisted on wearing his jeans, refusing to buy any jogging bottoms. Big mistake! I can vividly remember being guided into a position that resembled something out of a Twister party game, on the floor with my head turned to look out from under my right armpit. I had one direct view: a denim-covered bottom, dangerously straining in its similarly placed predicament. I found this hysterical and we both frequently burst into fits of giggles (not the done thing) especially when told to ‘relax your buttocks’ during final relaxation at the end. This was our first experience of yoga but we thought it was ‘ok’ enough to continue the course.

Things changed. We began to change. One of the first, subtle but profound benefits my partner and I noticed was that we both slept really soundly every Wednesday night, after each yoga class. Really soundly: falling asleep easily, sleeping deeply and waking up feeling refreshed.

What is different about yoga stretches?

As we gradually settled into the class routines and exercises I began to realize what was so different. We were actually discouraged from putting too much effort into our stretches. Trying harder just doesn’t work: it makes you tense up and shorten the muscles you want to lengthen. This is a big shift from our normal, everyday thinking: more effort must be better; no pain, no gain; achieve to succeed. This is the mindset that creates tension – and holds on to it.

With yoga stretches the focus is on letting go: less is more; the more you lose, the better you feel; being rather than doing. It offers a return to sanity, equilibrium and a deep sense of contentment. Instead of being conscious of all the external responsibilities you have to fulfil, consciousness is shifted to what’s going on inside your own body. It’s all about you. YOU re-connects with …YOU! When was the last time you checked in with yourself?

How to stretch more effectively

In practice this means allowing more time for individual stretches. I identify the point at which muscles naturally resist further movement and stay there. This should be a pleasant sensation. (Sometimes, when we ache all over and any movement is uncomfortable, we are suffering from body stiffness, not a lack of flexibility. This does hurt but the cause is more likely to be chemical imbalance or toxic overload within the body, just as is the case when coming down with the flu. Rest and de-toxing help address this, separate, problem – see below.)

I offer the body time by holding each stretch and relaxing into it. If it’s too tight I release the stretch a little so it can be relaxed. With each out-breath, I allow myself to let go of some of the stored tension within tight muscles. This is the most potent aspect of stretching: it is the point at which things really shift – the out-breath. It’s amazing how much our bodies respond and within a short amount of time, start releasing. This should feel great! It’s similar to massaging a tense muscle – a ‘good pain’ which shows you that you are addressing the problem and it makes you want to continue. Go too far and ‘actual pain’ starts to cause tension once more. Tension blocks energy flow around the body so releasing it does the opposite. You can literally feel a weight come off your shoulders and free movement return to your back and legs. The same thing occurs in your mind as focus is shifted from trying to achieve….to letting go of that need – it doesn’t serve you.

You know you are ready to finish each stretch when there has been a satisfying amount of ‘give’ and you can breathe deeply and easily into the stretch. Tension has been released. Come out of the stretch carefully as there is usually a significant amount of extension gained by then.

The difference between stiffness and lack of flexibility

In order to understand what’s going on within each muscle, I like to think of a woolly sweater that’s been shrunk in the wash. Quick, even strong, short-term stretching won’t make as much difference as leaving the sweater stretched over a chair and left a while. (Incidentally, a wet sweater would tend to ‘give’ more and this is akin to having warmed up muscles before stretching.) The longer it is left, the more complete and lasting the resulting stretch.

Whilst still using this analogy, imagine trying to stretch a sweater that has dirt trapped in it – old food stains that have got caught up in the woven fabric and congealed. This is akin to the toxic overload described above. The fabric is stiff and cannot stretch because the main problem is that each fibre needs to be cleaned of the toxic build-up of waste products. This is why people often feel so good when they have de-toxed or lost a bit of weight. They have given the body the opportunity to cleanse itself from matter that drags us down, which is also what causes stiffness. I take this as one of the first signs I need to eat light and give my body a break.

I did the splits when I was 30 years old, never before. I wasn’t striving for it, there was no pressure to achieve such a stretch; I just wondered how far I could get and enjoyed the sensation of opening up energy around the body. So each time I did some stretches, I added split-type stretches to my routine. No…let’s keep it real: often I added them as part of my routine; I did them often but not religiously…and got amazing results. One night, I was stretching…my mind was free, I was focused on the sensations of releasing resistance within my body….and I looked down and noticed my leg was flat on the floor – I’d achieved the splits! It just happened naturally but changed me profoundly. If I can achieve this at 30, what else can I achieve? Really, age is nothing!

Two years ago today Go with the Flow started meandering its way into the marketplace; so quietly that no-one actually noticed! However, from nothing, it has grown into a little stream with places to go, people to meet and plans to fulfil. I have been incredibly lucky to attract the most amazing client base who have actively helped and supported me on my way. In a sense, it is you who have created Go with the Flow~Massage and I thank you for that. I also must mention my Geek God: Gary who has saved me from technological troubles too many times to mention! The better established I become, the more I hope to serve my Flowing Clients…despite officially now being a terrible two-year-old!

DECEMBER OFFER: FREE Indian Head massage (15 min) when you book a half-hour back massage. Offer subject to availability – first come first served!

A thought for the day: what creates greater wellbeing – spare time or spare money?

The curry cure: a good quality vegetable jalfrezi is guaranteed to clear blocked sinuses and ward off winter chills! The first time I tried this I thought I was eating green beans…only to learn the hard way they were actually chillies! A little painful but highly effective for clearing the head. Alternate with mouthfuls of yoghurt, which cools any burning sensation better than water.

Why rush – surely the journey is half the fun?

In a nutshell: living in the present is only rosy if you make it that way. Practice gratitude. Enjoy small pleasures. Surround yourself with beautiful things, people and practices. Give love. Show appreciation for all we are given.

These simple practices bring a sense of deep inner contentment.

It is now quite normal to expect to live well into our 80’s, not unusual to have two careers, even two marriages! There is time to make mistakes…. and also make corrections. If your birthday celebration didn’t go as planned, or Christmas didn’t live up to expectations – no matter – you should have a fresh experience of each, every year, for the next few decades to put that right.

Of course, it is helpful to also consider the saying ‘Life is short’ and this can improve the quality of the choices we make. However, if used in the wrong context, it can induce a sense of fear and panic: should I be settled down by now, have children and be successful…especially as I could die any minute? What a depressing thought!

But to continue with cynicism: I have found that some of the worst times of my life have appeared to drag on relentlessly. If we then consider that ‘life is short’, we are in a very gloomy predicament indeed. For me, a breakthrough came when I realised the unfortunate circumstance I was in, could go on indefinitely. This thought then led me to make the best of things: to enjoy myself whilst life was so bad. So, I enjoyed food, I enjoyed music, I paid attention to the loving interactions I had with friends and family, all of which seemed more potent at that time. I enjoyed buying flowers I liked, in colours that brightened up my life, and doing little things that made me feel ‘treated’, all because I realised that life could also be long. It is possible to enjoy many things and to experience happiness, even when the larger picture is not quite so rosy.

I’ve noticed since that I am not alone with these realisations. Some time ago I was driving along the motorway when I noticed two drivers’ different outlooks, as I drove past. An elderly man was driving calmly, at a steady speed in the slow lane, ignoring or unaware of the frustration of the driver behind, who was clearly irritated by this slow pace and was eager to get past. The elderly man seemed peaceful and in no rush. As an onlooker it seemed so clear; ‘He’s the lucky one: he is content to be exactly where he is; the other driver wishes to be somewhere he is not.’

Enjoy the journey – this is where life takes place.

Hello and welcome to my new website! It is still in the process of being completed so there will be some additions and changes in the coming weeks.

Please feel free to ask questions or provide feedback in the meantime.